Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
