I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
