S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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