i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
