I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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