i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
