Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
