He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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