Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
