You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
