Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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