five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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