I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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