My brain says no but my pants say off.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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