like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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