Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
