didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
