but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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