I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize
