I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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