Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I will pee on everything he values.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
