i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
