would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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