gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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