if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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