If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
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