i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Randomize
