I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
