p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
