So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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