Got a toothbrush?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
