I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
