We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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