sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
