This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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