@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Boobs speak an international language.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
