if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
