If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Randomize
