i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
