Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
