haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I can text with my tongue
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
