the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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