She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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