Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
