You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
