i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
