Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
