I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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