im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
