Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
How drunk are you?
Completed.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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