i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
